pressure's building, gotta open the cap, let out the pent up energy before it explodes, it's a time bomb but it's not ticking, its stuck on zero it's ready to blow, Hi mom, I'm on a long mission, sorry I'm not picking up the phone. it's probably dead sitting uncharged under my drivers seat while I'm charging around the town. I know you love me enough to leave me alone, the time to come together has passed, at least for now... if my life falls into the hands of my enemies so be it, I tried to live for righteousness as hard as that is, please forgive me for my filhyiness, remember me for my fun moments, my joy my love and silliness. I'm sorry! I am not going to hurt you if you let me close, that might not be true but I'm not lying to you, I just cant always control what I do. that's why I choose to stay alone so I don't hurt anyone especially you. i want to get better but i don't know what to do, that might not be true, I do know what to do, but it's hard work and I'm historically lazy. I'm working on my discipline daily. I'm improving lately, cleaning up, working out, preparing to be a man. sometimes I fear I'm failing, I try to keep the faith to move forward, can you see the growth? I certainly hope so. thanks for listening to my innermost thoughts, I'll be alright, God is Good, Jesus saves.