end is now

Why do I go threw this life knowing I have no purpose, Wife friends family around me tell me that I'm worthless.I have felt alone for far to long, life on repeat like a song overplayed, sometimes I wonder if I have over welcomed my stay.Why was I put aside from the rest cuz I'm not normal,well I say im blessed when god made me I was to be different from all the rest. Why is it everyday I cant seem to get it right constantly battling these demons in my head every ing night. Hard to sleep always turning in the sheets evil presence everywhere has me in defeat constantly I repeat the thoughts of ending it all sitting here thinking will miss me at all everyone waiting for my downfall, I cannot stop this feeling it's a endless day after day feeling I just need some one to be there to start my healing my best friend in life not here nor close anymore every day seeing her with someone else and hurting me more and more cannot get out that door and bever turn back cause it feels like my heart was attacked and that that i cant take this no more string up the noose for the hanging and put out the fuse cause im in confusion thought i would be with her all my lifw well i guess that went out the window forgive me kids but my soul had to go cause i could not live this life without my friend till the end and its now.