what now puts me last used to put me first, I Used to Thank God everyday for a blessing I know now as a curse, How many times I gotta say that I'm Hurt Before you see the anguish of your , And the pain in your words, It's to the point I can feel My insides, dying I never felt nothing worse, The pain and anxiety that don't subside I swear to God im About to burst, Start smthinking of his past and how for him I aint Nothing ever work, In the midst of that Depression it goes that demon inside and around start to lurk, Same demon you beaten in delt whit before, But the fight used to have inside Died you aint got it any more, Besides this go Is different he aint whispering aint screaming it's a roar, And this aint just the battle it's the whole fucking war, Slowly but surely it's taking its toll He Can feel it hes losing control, Till one day He's sitting in his car and can't take it anymore so he rights up them letters n sends them in a text , ask God for forgiveness cuz he aint got nothing left, To thinks to him self and out loud he says how different things would be, If the one I cared about just cared about me ,next day's found in his car wit a hole his chest where his heart used to beat,and What I don't get no understands it is day is how can someone be hurting so badd and no one see the pain how can no 1 see the pay