vent session

fill my cup up,twist the diamonds,put em boff up in rotation,wont u lay back,kick ya feet up let the vibe take u away,,dont gotta do alotta speakin,to enjoy the conversation,if u with me then I'm witcha,all that extra shit just save it,ain't gotta lotta friends,shit I barely trust myself,I never know what imma do,might end up home or up in jail,I ain't never been no coward,I ain't never ran for help,I been pressured by police,and guess what bitch,I didnt tell,I kept shut like a man,and went and laid up in my cell,I got some insecurities,I blame that on my self,cuz if karma does exist,then I deserve to go thru hell,I done caused so much pain,I'm learnin how it felt,but it is what it is,I gotta play the hand I'm dealt,hold my girl,tell her I love her,some da I wonder ahe believe me,cuz for the first time in life,I speak them words and truly mean it,but in my head I battle demons,I dont never give up easy,but my heart's so full of scars,they use my weaknesses to beat me,paranoia sinks its teeth in,convincin me she's cheatin,to the point where I'm like fuck it,getcha shit and get to leavin,but i swore to tell the truth,no time to be facetious,if she ever walked away ,I'd prolly shatter into pieces,so if u listenin to me now, baby doll just know I need ya,ain't the type to sulk in sorrow,but my life's been full of pain,so much pressure,so much strain,finally broke me to my knees,and now I'm prayin for a change,so sick of treading muddy water,fuckin my shoes up in the rain,but it showin no sign of stoppin,same storm different day,fuck it call me bill murry,fuck this groundhogs day,