I woke up this morning heart feeling heavy a lot of shit on my mind I'm gonna take it back to dec 19 of 17 so you can see some pain threw my eyes my son brooklyn was 4 at the time that was my lil nigga he looked back at me smiling was when I got shot and my problems just got bigger I crawled over and realized the bullet that got me went straight threw and took the life of my lil nigga my son's father screaming at my new nigga the bullet was for u but I shot my baby moms and killed my son go figure fuck me this gotta be a dream I'm laying here shot in the neck thinking of ways to kill him n send his ass downstream my 2 daughter and my son was my team I feel lost that's why I walk around with 2 9's i don't trust I'm always looking for a scheme bc life right now is fucked up no laughter it's not what it use to be therapist said melissa it gets easier there's no getting easier when u lose your king around the holidays is the worst I feel like I be neglecting my queens luckily for me they grown in there late teens that's why I smoke alot of weed and drink Henny to forget I want somebody to save me they my crew I feel like I failed my son wanting to move on to something new I would've stayed with the abuse I would've stayed bloody with the black n blues brooklyn I'm sorry my son I love you if mommy only knew..