Step One: Blank Pages

(Intro) Yeah… I spent my whole life trying not to become what I came from and somehow still ended up broken (Verse 1) My childhood like a blank book, missing half the pages Only flashes I remember full of fear and hatred Three years old when the house split into pieces Parents used me like a weapon while my soul lost meaning Running from my mom to my dad then back again Trying to find safety but the chaos never ends Saw my father beat my mother, watched addiction in her eyes Passed out on the floor while I learned to survive Nobody asked how I felt, I just carried the weight Became emotionally responsible at a child’s age Caretaker for broken people while I buried my pain And every feeling that I swallowed still echoes today So I turned chameleon, learned to blend into the walls Shape-shift for acceptance, never knowing who I was Escaping through books and galaxies above Cause imaginary worlds was safer than where I was (Hook) Step one… I admit I can’t control it All the pain I kept inside finally overflowin’ Thought I could outrun the blood and the broken moments But unmanageability is written in the motions Step one… powerlessness hurts Cause the truth hits hard when you finally search I was trying to save everybody but myself first Now acceptance is the shovel digging through the dirt (Verse 2) I swore I’d never be them, that was always the plan Control everything around me so I’d still be a man But trauma doesn’t disappear because you understand It leaks into your spirit and muddy up your hands Codependent love, trying to heal through someone else Giving pieces of my heart while abandoning myself Addiction told me lies like “you still got control” Till the mirror showed a stranger and the mask finally showed Brand new Kia Soul five hundred miles and gone Wrapped it round destruction while insisting nothing’s wrong Lost my kids to DCF, livin a double life Now two years of silence cuts deeper than a knife That’s the part nobody sees when recovery begins The grief sitting quietly underneath the skin Not just substances — the sickness lives within Thinking I could play God and outrun where I’ve been (Hook) Step one… I admit I can’t control it All the pain I kept inside finally overflowin’ Thought I could outrun the blood and the broken moments But unmanageability is written in the motions Step one… powerlessness hurts Cause the truth hits hard when you finally search I was trying to save everybody but myself first Now acceptance is the shovel digging through the dirt (Bridge) Acceptance ain’t weakness It’s finally telling the truth Saying “I can’t do this alone” Instead of pretending I’m bulletproof And every day clean I remind myself why I stay Even when my heart breaks I’m finally walking the right way (Outro) Yeah… maybe step one ain’t the end of pride maybe it’s the first honest moment of your life @rapfame_official @rapfame_ar_team thank you for the opportunity to share my experience strength and hope! 11 more in eleven days letsss goooooo!