stand your ground

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"Lost It All (But the Dog Hurts Most)" Yeah, I lost my job back in early July, Boss said "pack your desk" didn't tell me why, Two weeks later got the pink slip in the mail, Twenty years of work, now I'm destined to fail. Lost my paycheck, lost my benefits too, Health insurance gone, what am I gonna do? Unemployment's a joke, can't pay the bills, Started stackin' up debt, started poppin' pills. Then my wife said she'd had enough of me, Said I wasn't the man that I used to be, Packed her bags, said she needed space, Took half my stuff and left without a trace. Lost my wife, lost my marriage, lost my ring, Lost the future we planned, lost everything, Lawyers got involved, papers got signed, She got the settlement, I got left behind. But that ain't even the worst part, nah, She took my dog when she drove away far, My best friend, my loyal companion, Now I'm alone in this empty mansion. Well, not a mansion, more like a shack, 'Cause the bank came callin', took the house back, Foreclosure notice on the front door, Thirty days to vacate, can't live here no more. Lost my house, lost my home, lost my land, Everything I built with my own two hands, The place where I grew up, where my kids were raised, Now it's gone, I'm stuck in a daze. They repossessed my truck last Tuesday night, Came and towed it, didn't put up a fight, My F-150, my pride and joy, Now I'm walkin' everywhere like some lost boy. Lost my truck, lost my wheels, lost my ride, Can't get to work even if I tried, Had that thing since 2003, Now it's gone, just like everything. Then they came for my boat down at the dock, Said I missed payments, time to take stock, My fishing boat, my weekend escape, Now it's gone, sealed up my fate. Lost my boat, lost my peace on the lake, Lost the one place I'd go for a break, No more sunrise fishing trips alone, Just me and my thoughts, now they're gone. Credit cards maxed, bank account's at zero, Went from family man to broken hero, Sold my tools, sold my TV, Sold my guitar, sold my dignity. Friends stopped callin', family don't come 'round, I'm the cautionary tale in this small town, Lost my pride, lost my self-respect, Lost everything, I'm a total wreck. But here's the thing that keeps me up at night, The thing that haunts me, the thing that ain't right, It ain't the job, the house, the truck, or the boat, It's my dog that she took, that's what hurts the most. I could rebuild my life, start from scratch, Find a new job, new house to match, Buy a new truck, maybe buy a new boat, But I can't replace my dog, that's all she wrote. He never Here's an Eminem-style COUNTRY rap about your wife leaving and taking the dog: "She Took My Dog" Well she packed her bags on a Tuesday mornin', Didn't give a sign, didn't give no warnin', Said she'd had enough, said we were through, But when she walked out that door, guess who she took too? My dog, my buddy, my best friend, Now I'm sittin' here alone wonderin' when, I'll see that wagging tail come through the door, But she took him with her, don't live here no more. I miss that dog more than I miss her, it's true, He never complained, never started fights too, He'd greet me at the door with a bark and a smile, She'd greet me with a list of chores a mile. He'd sit by my side while I watched the game, She'd roll her eyes, say I'm always the same, He never cared if I left the seat up, She'd lose her mind over a dirty coffee cup. She took my dog, left me here alone, Now I'm talkin' to myself in an empty home, I don't miss the naggin', don't miss the fights, But I miss that dog keepin' me warm at night. He never judged me for drinkin' a beer, She'd give me that look, make it crystal clear, He'd fetch the ball, didn't matter how many throws, She'd say "grow up" and wrinkle her nose. I called her up, said "Can I see him?" She laughed and hung up, chances are slim, Now I'm drivin' by the park where we used to go, Throwin' sticks to myself, man, this is low. She got the house, she got the car, She got the savings, she got it all so far, But the thing that hurts, cuts me to the bone, Is she took my dog and left me here alone. He never asked for much, just food and a walk, She always wanted more, we'd argue and talk, He'd curl up at my feet when I was feelin' down, She'd tell me to man up, stop actin' like a clown. I scroll through pictures on my phone at night, Him chasin' squirrels, runnin' outta sight, Floppy ears, tongue hangin' out the side, Now he's with her, and I just wanna cry. She took my dog, yeah, she took my friend, Guess this is how a good thing ends, I'd trade it all just to have him back, That loyal companion, that furry soulmate. So here's to the dog that she took away, I hope he's happy, I hope he's okay, And if she ever gets tired of him too, I'll be right here waitin', that's what I'll do. She took my dog, my tail-waggin' pal, Left me here alone in this empty corral, I don't miss her perfume or her cold shoulder shrug, But I miss that dog, man, I need a hug. Want me to make it funnier, sadder, or add more dog vs. wife comparisons? 😄

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