When I fade off

I see the eyes of Torment i see the pain in forces, and the purpose to feel worthless, like why does anyone deserve us? and observe us to take notes in a 3 ring circus point and laugh and hurt us, as the earth shucks the mind fucks mind flux divide us into a crisis, I tried to act the nicest but now the pain is violence, so everyday in silence misguidance obituary flowing through a cemetery wondering which head to carry, I've been quiet for so long and now that my minds gone and the shames off I wonder when I'll fade off?