I'm broken 💔

I'm so sad and depressed I can't hardly look at myself in the mirror after my do feels like I'm lonely so I am going to pull the trigger to my head and kill myself my kids is in the living room send Daddy what are you doing I told my son that says I have a life son a horrible life a trash life your mother hates me I don't know what to do with your mother I'm sick and tired of having mother but these demons are killing me they want me to kill myself to hang myself to put me in prison but I want to let that slide at all I have to protect my kids at all cost I'll do whatever it takes to protect them I have family to take care of I have to have food now that's giving food but what do I do now my wife comes home drunk lays in the bed I told her to get up she can barely stand up the end.... friend