mentally disturbed

This is not a movie this is life that I'm living in reality keeps grabbing me it's stabbing me it's sickening my mind keeps spinning I think the drugs are kicking in the Angel and the devil in my conscience keep on bickering they're laughing snickering gossiping and whispering I'm doing good making moves but can't keep the discipline so I take the trip get the bag then I bag the dope the world gets darker scarier for those of us who lack and Hope I hate the mirror it brings the fear cuz I see what's factual the slipping of my worth is going fast but feels gradual she says she loves me but it's not true it's not magical it's Obsession control it's nothing but fanatical prison in my mind can't break free from the manacles fear is holding life in his hands as collateral I'm popping off at the mouth and I keep on popping Adderall thinking about the life that I had when I had it all w chiccken and hitting it with inositol