My Demon an I's First Meeting
#UST Grandma, I remember that night vividly ta the point nvm I'll just lyrically scetch that scene, wait, here let me breathe, okay so... I re-member it oh so picture perfectly, I arrived, then i walked inside as I climbed, each step while I plant my feet ta floors that leave rippling creeks, eerie is mirrored at the brink, at time like these dont blink I walk inta the room too the left, catty cornered from my old room as a kid, I came in sat down in that chair next ta flo's bed had my reflectin' going outta wack finally the child has grown ta come home ta meet death at its bed, waiting for the cut of the thread, it was summer but yet all i can remember was how i was feelin cold an unblessed, the nurse was checking the oxygen tube attached ta her nose, grandma's image remains flash'n, etched permantly in my corneas nerve like threads, her eyes grown shark like an dull they're lookin' dead, sounds only comparable ta that of shieks reach my ear as raspy gasps of air soundin out my previously previous generations old neck, eyes rollin' back an forthe, in an out of her head, a suction hose down your throat, cancer knocking at every door housin'a lymph node in that weak body she had, i silently sigh an weakly I said, Hi, grandma how are you tonight its your grandson shawn here ta say he loves you very much an ta give you his good luck an bye's, oh jesus christ, why is it that I?couldnt believe what i, was seeing with my very own sulfur flash burned eye's, cause it took everything in me that night, not ta just break down right then an cry knowing she couldnt speak with I, depressed I was cause my grand mothers conciousness was freed ta a place beyond that I couldnt reach even if I tried while she remained currently still tied ta this reality she seamed ta just be boarder right? How could I, I choked, the sight I've now seen had me croaked i was definitley feeling provoked, my throat took a hold and tightly closed all air an words alike so I couldn't squeeze or release the mere pin sized thicket of sentences to-'a-ppease the stagnet air between us, as time seemed froze huh, my hand upon your's not a soul could've made me untwine or disconnect, as frozen chills ran through my every goosebump an electrified velvet like hair that night all the way down my spin an up from my toes I, no longer could feel any spite she had once shown as an unestinguishable internal light, you finally had enough an had lost that will along with every ounce of energy, needed ta fight that thing beconning you towards the light, winds sweeped the windows as brushes of branches tapped like they wanted ta know whats going on inside, I weeped, I sighed I said, I loved you from the heart where i internally bled even more then, than on most nights, then i up an left it was about 3 am as i drove home, and layed down justa toss an turn until passed out finally at home alone on the couch wondering why so soon, not even a min later after resting my head i recieved that text, the words read that you apparetly left us an passed on at the very moment i fell ta rest, this was somthing i didnt know until that next morning when i finally awoke, you died that very night, somthin inside me blew out my fight that fiery light once burning so deeply inside, instead it came out'n shown its way through my aura angry an sad i was deeply upset even mad, i grabbed my facade and barracaded myself behind a mask made of bricks, i guess i couldnt face the facts, that you were finaly dead, i shut down and slowly drifted off and lost my job an everything i loved an cared about and ever had, i let it all go ta shit, all cause i let, that massive amount of dread, come in an take over my head, it drove me ta write not ta confide, an even more on every night on I rapped out the words that wrapped my head as I emotionally weeped an internally bleed, the rest is a tale ill finish another night instead as its time ta rest my head, i love you im sorry i waited so song ta get this off my chest. i hope you felt my presence before you left. i miss you, but its time for bed.
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Grandma, I remember that night vividly ta the point nvm I'll just lyrically scetch that scene, wait, here let me breathe, okay so... I re-member it oh so picture perfectly, I arrived, then i walked inside as I climbed, each step while I plant my feet ta floors that leave rippling creeks, eerie is mirrored at the brink, at time like these dont blink I walk inta the room too the left, catty cornered from my old room as a kid, I came in sat down in that chair next ta flo's bed had my reflectin' going outta wack finally the child has grown ta come home ta meet death at its bed, waiting for the cut of the thread, it was summer but yet all i can remember was how i was feelin cold an unblessed, the nurse was checking the oxygen tube attached ta her nose, grandma's image remains flash'n, etched permantly in my corneas nerve like threads, her eyes grown shark like an dull they're lookin' dead, sounds only comparable ta that of shieks reach my ear as raspy gasps of air soundin out my previously previous generations old neck, eyes rollin' back an forthe, in an out of her head, a suction hose down your throat, cancer knocking at every door housin'a lymph node in that weak body she had, i silently sigh an weakly I said, Hi, grandma how are you tonight its your grandson shawn here ta say he loves you very much an ta give you his good luck an bye's, oh jesus christ, why is it that I?couldnt believe what i, was seeing with my very own sulfur flash burned eye's, cause it took everything in me that night, not ta just break down right then an cry knowing she couldnt speak with I, depressed I was cause my grand mothers conciousness was freed ta a place beyond that I couldnt reach even if I tried while she remained currently still tied ta this reality she seamed ta just be boarder right? How could I, I choked, the sight I've now seen had me croaked i was definitley feeling provoked, my throat took a hold and tightly closed all air an words alike so I couldn't squeeze or release the mere pin sized thicket of sentences to-'a-ppease the stagnet air between us, as time seemed froze huh, my hand upon your's not a soul could've made me untwine or disconnect, as frozen chills ran through my every goosebump an electrified velvet like hair that night all the way down my spin an up from my toes I, no longer could feel any spite she had once shown as an unestinguishable internal light, you finally had enough an had lost that will along with every ounce of energy, needed ta fight that thing beconning you towards the light, winds sweeped the windows as brushes of branches tapped like they wanted ta know whats going on inside, I weeped, I sighed I said, I loved you from the heart where i internally bled even more then, than on most nights, then i up an left it was about 3 am as i drove home, and layed down justa toss an turn until passed out finally at home alone on the couch wondering why so soon, not even a min later after resting my head i recieved that text, the words read that you apparetly left us an passed on at the very moment i fell ta rest, this was somthing i didnt know until that next morning when i finally awoke, you died that very night, somthin inside me blew out my fight that fiery light once burning so deeply inside, instead it came out'n shown its way through my aura angry an sad i was deeply upset even mad, i grabbed my facade and barracaded myself behind a mask made of bricks, i guess i couldnt face the facts, that you were finaly dead, i shut down and slowly drifted off and lost my job an everything i loved an cared about and ever had, i let it all go ta shit, all cause i let, that massive amount of dread, come in an take over my head, it drove me ta write not ta confide, an even more on every night on I rapped out the words that wrapped my head as I emotionally weeped an internally bleed, the rest is a tale ill finish another night instead as its time ta rest my head, i love you im sorry i waited so song ta get this off my chest. i hope you felt my presence before you left. i miss you, but its time for bed.
Deep bro