ever feel like you're drowning & no one around will help out you swear they wouldn't care if you decided to kill yourself that is real life until I realized no one can save me from my biggest enemy if he is myself it's Cmk can somebody help me my mental health isn't healthy & becoming more self destructive an unproductive member of this society that judges me like a jury anxiety filling my mind with worry go nowhere but always in a hurry God show mercy on this journey called life guide me to your light cause right now I can't see it like my vision is blurry but it's 20/20 & goin' into 2021 what I become is a person I never wanted to be is the old me dead or in a coma living in a dream or a nightmare either way I pray I can wake up & make up for all the mistakes I made along the way fight fear overcoming the odds & maybe even get right with God its Cmk I'm I beyond saving can I ever break this bond with Satin get rid of these demons change myself like seasons or remain in pain for no real reason pretending to be okay when I'm not blame God for everything I don't got do nothing about it go home smoke pot get stoned go to sleep get up go to work come home & smoke some more doing the same shit tomorrow I did yesterday i hope for better days but don't do a single thing to improve my situation 1 plus 1 equals 2 right ? what good does that do me if I keep removing myself from the equation save me from me quick cause I am sick of waiting feeling like a doctor with covid 19 don't know why I keep losin' my patients get impatient life is limitless why do I keep living with limitations giving in to expectations