unheard apologies

I exhale I inhale , I pray at night that all is well, I miss you miss your face miss your kisses miss your sweet embrace, out of my life you vanished gone for good if I had the chance to tell you how much I loved you all that you meant to me I would, what are we doing why are we here, tell me the purpose of human life, tell my why everything is in existence, my heart pounds, I can feel my arteries swell, you know me more then I know myself, I never meant to hurt you please trust in me how shitty I feel, the hurt and pain inside of me is so surreal, I never meant for the pain in me to be exposed on you, I'd give anything to take it back, one life one chance one mistake one is too many a thousand never enough, I never meant to hurt you this is really rough .. I will not ask for your forgiveness, not sure if you can understand this, I understand the anger the hurt your pain, once someone hurts you so badly, there's never any going back, to the place where we trusted one another, it's only feelings of paranoia in your head on your mind these thoughts running through ya... once again my childhood best friend I'll always love you hold you dear to my heart... I apologize for the consequence of my actions.