Big Deal

Tonight on Clozapine 50 milligrams. Week 2nd. My auditory hallucinations and I pretty much had a debate again that I did that much of a deed where I brought Hinduism to the 1st position. Over Christianity and Islam. Through the Holy Bible, Quran and the Hindu religious scripture the Ramcharitmanas. What happened is blessing me through Godly idols were Lord Shiva and Goddess Durga. The Shivlingam that blessed me on the night of Mahashivratri by dropping down a bunch of bel leaves. At the Shiv Shakti Temple within the Edmonton Fiji community. Shivlingam is the symbol of the no form God. So the highest. Goddess Durga is Lord Shiva’s consort. The highest form. Her idols and picture blessed me by dropping down two marigold flowers and a hand full of vermillion at three different occasions. One of them I recorded. The highest Hindu religious scripture the Ramcharitmanas. Which I had placed to the number 1 position in the world before the religious scripture blessed me on the night of Diwali by dropping down a marigold flower for me. These five blessings on five different occasions tells me that the two deities are with my religious delusions. Because being God and Goddess. They are omniscient. I have completed my “divine mission.” Bringing Hinduism to the number 1 position. Through attaining the correct knowledge. Doing hard earned karma and intense devotion. What my auditory hallucinations deal is that I did such a big religious task. Then why aren’t I’m famous. Why aren’t I’m rich. Then why do I feel like I’m being treated wrong. By both people and my auditory hallucinations. I’m only winning these attacks because I’m honest. I heard a kirtan long after I started my devotion. “Na daulat na shaurat badi cheej hai, na hira na moti badi cheej hai.” Agar is duniya mein koi cheej hai badi, Krishna charno ki Bhakti badi cheej hai.” Meaning neither money nor fame is a big deal. Neither diamond nor pearl is a big deal. If there is anything that is a big deal. The devotion of the feet of Lord Krishna is a big deal. Which was already included in my prayers every time I pray. Even today.