No mercy

deceitful, cheating, playing games, lying, no more integrity pride honor entitlement so sick of these words here we go again, up pacing the floor will it ever end will I ever be the me I was, before... I snapped that night an lost all hope gave up on life at the end of my rope should i tie up a noose so it don't come loose make sure the knot is right so it slips tight not too long right at the right height dear Lord I hope you here me when I say I never thought the day I'd see your face would end this way but there's absolutely no way I'm gonna make it through another day let alone another night you see how I'm treated, stampeded you see the me she makes me be when all I want is to be free and every time I think im gonna be another wall in front of me a problem in slaves me a problem I surely don't need you can see how bad the family gets burned when the conversations get heated please Lord I don't need to hear your voice a sign be fine just so i know I'm on your mind I don't trust this thing beatin inside my chest. no comfort no help when I'm in distress failing the test it'll be best if I Rip it out turn this room into a panic attack, yeah, a bloody mess, and never look back watchem all retract an react while I extract my sole from the hole my demons control I drown in my thoughts, suffocated by fears paint a smile on my face forsake the base of my faith as these demons are holding me down trying to drown any hope or happiness that might come around thes insecurities choking me now evoking some how the demons that follow an bring their darkness around it's just the way I live my life i take it day by day I'm on my way to a place to convey how heavy burdens weigh I'm tryin not to break holding my head down in disgrace so i sway cant seem to find the light of day so i stray away with the weight of the world on my shoulders I try to be bolder so i can work up the nerve hoping I'm heard when i know i don't deserve 1 SINGLE DOSE OF MERCY