Great blessings (2024)

this year been so crazy yes i just want less stress can't complain still bless even tho my life is a mess no more second guessing my ability and ignore what god got in-stored for me people say i changed alot but they gotta understand alot change me at 18 and made a choice to become something better what i seen and not be doing what everyone was doing around me its just not me god didn't make me with any hate in me i just turn pain into fate and pray all the bad away and forget any bad thing that happen to me gotta keep moving and proving everybody wrong can't do what I do because you ant me i said what i was gonna be ant my fault they didn't believe me im something they couldn't be achieve each one of my goals and receive what ever i have coming to me i can only handle so much until im finally fed up and just want everyone away from me and stay away like they did the last time they did to me last time i check I can do it all by myself i really don't need to one help the only way out is to believe in myself don't look back at the past because it's not meant to last alot praying i don't make it out but I'm the one who stayed and figured it out and not give up wish I could Alot of time's tho but i can't no im not doing really good im just handling my bullshit a little better than you and not gonna speak on it i was taught to keep it to myself and be silent because no one really care how you feel or how I got here what do I need to do to make it clear I do not need anyone near to face what I'm going though my god haven't left my side but I felt like i did by his please forgive me for being ungrateful when I ask for a blessing you didn't just give me one you gave me a couple so I humble myself and put myself in your shoes for once I'm sorry I gave you so much trouble I learn and learn after time again still struggling to find you and being myself everyday I count my blessings no doubt I just want to be that kid that made his father proud and make everyone who I have around happy the world so depress some forgot to smile and if you have nobody around enjoy your own company look in mirror and worry about you see how you been and thank God everyday for us being here today and dieing for our sins and for us to live and do more no more living in lies we all got good inside