Everyday

If Adhd had a voice Listen carefully because it's about to be destroyed by the pills I take at 12pm everyday now Everyday my alarm goes off in my head if I could tell you every single medication I am on it would go a little something like this Everyday now Concerta 54mg to quiet quiet quite the Adhd we don't want it around fluoxatine to boost the seratonin in my brain ketamine to mask my pain physical or mental you decide Everyday now Topamax that's a neurological disorder since childhood migraines like static on the TV numbness on my body neurological disorders arnt they all from the same place Everyday now 12pm concerta 18mg again gotta shut the Adhd down before I sing a song 2 o'clock ketamine again I'm on a cloud to bandaid my chronic pain so it's not around Everyday now 3 o clock opioids run the show palexia sounds like a fast car a robotic robotics is that what's installed maybe I could take just one pill and flush my troubles away come on let's be real you gotta have a little bit of anxiety a little bit of depression keep the mental hospital doors open for business ring the billing line pay for your 15 minute appointment your in the system now come to this safe place we will help you we will help you feel better you won't be able to sleep you won't be able to speak we do all that for you but come to us you'll feel much better now it's ok to cry you have a disease I'm not mentally trained but I'll touch your hand and make you freeze Everyday now Could be worse I could be in a public facility I have it good here I shouldn't take it for granted for granted overprescribing me medication for a diagnosis I do not have but listen to the doctors as they know what's at hand Everyday now When I can't open my eyes paralyzed inside my skin tickled my feet I jult awake to get the milligrams upped I fall back to sleep malpractice you think I think so take responsibility no no no no no so drugged I fell and broke my back I still haven't told you the meds I take at night Melatonin 5mg because it's natural Topamax for neurological disorder on occasion olanazpine a medication I dispise I'm back paralyzed clonazepam I'm allowed two tablets a day of I miss it I will have a seziour this makes my mind go in loops as I'm an over thinker crazy you may think crazy I may be autistic you say autistic I may be I pay my pension money for a diagnosis on a peice of paper of validation that how I think really matters Hide your children hide your scars don't let nobody see you see surface level you don't know me If you knew why I did what I did you lay see me in a new light or just tred in the opposite direction and dismiss pretend it never happened yeah that worked for some years holding it inside acting as it was apart of me but something that has died It worked until the vodka run out and I could walk a straight line I saw it up close as my sexuality I hid and shut the lid and years went by Let me go Let me go Let me go Starved myself so I could be non existent until forced to save my life to look at WHAT THE FUCK HAPPENED TO Me and take it with a knife not to my skin I'm done with that to sever the ties that held me victim I want no more then to be human They lerk in the background they have no control I got my life back This is just the beginning of who I was and who I am and who am I kidding this is just my first track