Sleep 2

Sleep is only for the deserving Close my eyes but I just keep on hurting Choices that I made won't go away I Pray for forgiveness every fucking day When the enemy is within Even when they lose there is no way to win The physical pain is easy to bear unlike the mental There is no way to compare If I could go back and have another chance. Just to have one more song and one last dance. If I go one place in that time machine, to hell with fixing my leg I would go rescue my queen I have a million things I wish I could say, I wish even one could keep you from walking away Its looking out for me the kind words you say making me feel special Like a million dollar pay If you see in in a blank stare it's because In the back of my mind I'm already there. We are in the kitchen cooking Working as a team Unstoppable together whippin up the dream I wish we could sit under our tree As hard as I try it Will never look the same to me. That's where our kids were supposed to play As we sit and talk, do a devotional and pray. I want to just go ahead and cut it down It would be like my life and Bare like the ground. Like the seeds we planted I wanted to watch us grow But unfortunately because of my mistake we will never even know. I've never fought for so hard for love before it's because i see the potential and so much more I'm willing to forgive and I'm willing to forget This is not how it should be I'm tired of seeing you upset You say that's only possible by me letting go Time to Dry up my tears and Put on a show. Slap on a smile and pretend im not broke Pull out the bottle And take another toke When the drugs quit working and I'm left with my thoughts, I'll pour another drink and add extra shots. Drowning the regret is a temporary fix, it becomes less effective so you start to do a mix Uppers with downers just like my mood I get so numb I don't even want food If i do it enough, I can forget to remember how i fucked up my family or what I'll do in December. The vision of the future has demons stirred in They won't let me forget That I'm just a burden. who do i call when i need to cry out for help, when i woke from surgery its always been you i felt if you get hurt and I'm not there, who will be around and show you that they care just know you were special to me I'll never forgive myself for making you leave. people know each other for decades or more, but we missed forever by a few month door. i have no doubt why your walking away i know i can do nothing to make you stay I'm getting paid back and getting my serving Sleep is only for the deserving