song for my ex

so my ex says this months after I left he didn't know or notice the patterns I made was for him just thoughts of me cheating and being untrue here is what he said to me leaving me feeling so very sad and so very blue remember how I told you it looked like you was cheating and if you weren't make it stop change the actions in what you do that makes it look as if you are. I'm not saying you are. I'm saying i notice the small changes the nails the haircut new polish the beautiful makeup and I notice the change in perfume and the new aroma therapy bath you drew. make it stop please it looks as if I am losing you. so he says this all and notices the changes I made only to insinuate that it looks like I am cheating or talking to someone new because of the small changes I made to be a better woman for him. I'm big on appearances yes you will never find me slipping when it comes to fashion my makeup is on point from the YouTube I watched that day I not perfect but still learning it all i can't say anything to him he wouldn't understand yes I cut my hair during the full moon that day so it can grow faster longer through the winter that's just the native American way but he didn't ask why I did all this. in the back of his mind he already had an idea drawn up in his head about me and whoever doing it in his bed all he did and said was wrong nothing proving facts just me being insulted hurt pushed down deep below the ground he walked on I was shooting for the stars above while he threw me down to the ground with his words. I would of given him the moon if he only listened to me first. but he didn't you see he insulted me saying he knows I am cheating with the new do new makeup and fashionable clothes that's all he needed to assume I was out cheating. it's fine I'm done with all the accusations you yelled at me taunted me asking me over and over why did I change my looks why the new clothes. the real reason was I didn't feel loved by you any more I didn't feel wanted or needed as you sit there looking at your phone and porn I felt ugly I didn't see you look at me like you use to just seen a glimpse of a picture of who I thought you wanted sadness and depression set in as abandonment worries what's going to happen next. at a last attempt to get you to notice me you was to far gone with the thoughts in your head of me and someone else you accused me and finally during the last days you lost me because I found someone who just had nice words to say. a friend indeed who continues to remain that way but you never met him or maybe you have from back in the day. it doesn't matter now my attempt to shine in your eyes through our darkest of times only made me feel lost with no words to say. I can't tell you enough of why I left only bits of pieces with nothing to be said I left you because of all the thoughts in your head I changed my looks only to be cussed and depressed. I look good today because I prayed to find myself and find my way God's with Me now and forever he will stay.