I've got paranoia/ paint my windows black/ pull the shades down/ feeling crazed now/ paddy wagons coming/to take me out my dungeon/cuz I'm rusting/ and I'm rotting/ in this checker game/ king me motherfucker/im getting jumped everyday/full of pain when I say/I wish to God I would fade/take me down like the world trade/demolition style/this world has made me vile/and its always twisting my words/ gets om my nerves/deeply disturbed/im weeping in church/with a fifth of vodka/wishing God would holler/ but he still remains silent/ think of death before I close my eyelids/ open to a hole/ that's now a virus/ spreading quickly/ my attitude is risky/ badly bruised from whiskey/ anybody listening/I hear a dial tone/ im really on my own/got me in the zone/ drifting in those catacombs/feeling mumafied/have to check my pulse to see if im really alive/its got me terrified/ and so sick within/ pains flowing at the brim/ where should I begin/had my privates touched/ now who should I trust/ I was only ten/ and waiting for that ceiling fan to do me in/ but it broke/ I dropped to the floor/ I was more than angry/death I did explore/ my mama says I need to rest/ but there's demons in my head/ pulling all nighters/full of false idols/so I flick my lighter/in hopes that I can get a grip/ its hit or miss/tired of being the target/ got me loosing my shit at a target/how do I start/ I simply fall apart/ and wrestle in the dark with this evil I know/not putting on a show/it's just an episode/fucking change the channel/ cuz my soul is sampled/and given out in pieces/ think I need some jesus/ grip that cruxifix/I feel the blood flowing through my wrist/ why do I exist/cuz life's a bitch/throw a little bit of hatred in the fucking mix/I think I'll never make it/can't stand feeling like this/ my futures not the brightest/full of darkened diners/ where people eat in silence/ never say a word/ they have a God to serve/ I feel my hate emerge/swear I gave my soul/ now this hole disturbs/ can't control my nerves/ im getting what I deserve/ there's no supper time in my mind/ it's simply desert/ without a cheery/ I can't scream when burried/im just another stupid addict in a pine box/ just forget about me/not even worth your thoughts.