my life fucking sucks
there always to much stress to handle bc i lost my great grandma and great grandpa 2 to 3 months ago and i feel werid without my grandma in my life.. that she cant be there to see my 15 birthday or even when i get married when im older... i love my family but there times when i wanted to kill myself bc i was jsut in so much pain.. i suffer for so long since i was kid... my parents dont know the full reason why i went to the hospital... those time i was in hospital i kept trying to kill myself but i was always come back to normal i felt like the world was telling me its not time to go yet..m but i prayed that i didn't want live anymore everything in my life was horrible i saw things at a young age...i got bullied for me being me... now dont bc i changed my personality and i love my new personality but my family doesn't im slowly trying to bring back my old self but every time i do i cry bc it reminds me what happened to me when i used to be my old self.... but life fucked me up bad... life doesn't like me but still wants me alive which i dont understand why... my parents dont see the pain in my eyes or my fake smile... or my fake laugh.... im scared to say that im in pain... and that i been depressed for 10 years going on to 11 years now... but my words cant speak anymorw.. i tried to tell and tell and i jsut freeze.. i been scared i saw so many things that no teenagers should go through.... i wanted to give up slowly.. but im here bc i love my family... its sad how some of my family dont see the pain in my eyes or even tell if i wanted to kill myself.. but ig im just good hiding my own depression.... i hope one day they dont found out about these bc i dont wanna see them cry over me😔.
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there always to much stress to handle bc i lost my great grandma and great grandpa 2 to 3 months ago and i feel werid without my grandma in my life.. that she cant be there to see my 15 birthday or even when i get married when im older... i love my family but there times when i wanted to kill myself bc i was jsut in so much pain.. i suffer for so long since i was kid... my parents dont know the full reason why i went to the hospital... those time i was in hospital i kept trying to kill myself but i was always come back to normal i felt like the world was telling me its not time to go yet..m but i prayed that i didn't want live anymore everything in my life was horrible i saw things at a young age...i got bullied for me being me... now dont bc i changed my personality and i love my new personality but my family doesn't im slowly trying to bring back my old self but every time i do i cry bc it reminds me what happened to me when i used to be my old self.... but life fucked me up bad... life doesn't like me but still wants me alive which i dont understand why... my parents dont see the pain in my eyes or my fake smile... or my fake laugh.... im scared to say that im in pain... and that i been depressed for 10 years going on to 11 years now... but my words cant speak anymorw.. i tried to tell and tell and i jsut freeze.. i been scared i saw so many things that no teenagers should go through.... i wanted to give up slowly.. but im here bc i love my family... its sad how some of my family dont see the pain in my eyes or even tell if i wanted to kill myself.. but ig im just good hiding my own depression.... i hope one day they dont found out about these bc i dont wanna see them cry over me😔.
very nice to meet you your music 🔥
it will get better i promise for every bad day 2 good one coming