dad

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another night without sleep I hover outside the shouting screen melodies on repeat speaking to me interpretation of my life through sounds cuts my heart like a knife as it resonates my soul with annihilation of it with time see my dad left me behind for his friends never kept me insight left me in the dark with a spark to say my amens that he just might comprehend the message he sent when he left but I waited patiently bravely escaping the fear with every tic of time till my mum has arrived after work with my heart torn I said a word and said goodnight happy that she was inside and so it continued every time for the rest of my life till the age of five by that time I felt nothing for him inside roll on years later past when I left him for my mum im in England now i found out that he's died and suddenly emotions arrise like an explosion to my surprise I wana go to the funeral but my mum doesn't have the dough to be used and I cant stand the sight of him not being alive so I don't go and forget about that time but memories of him still lingere sad melodies resonate with in me as it resonates with in her i try to remember the good times but there was none with him so the connection i have with him is primitive after all the times he's left me for his friends he was still my dad he gave me life and as deep as it cut that he wasn't by my side I'm still thankful for him giving me life as that lead to meeting people that I liked and fell in love with wimen learned new things and learned forgiveness and as I think this voices pop back in my head they start speaking that he doesn't deserve forgiveness he should burn for his moral insufficiencys they say that he should of raised me in his light provided me with food instead of going out with his friends at night and my reply to that was non of us perfect we all need learning educate our minds how can I blame him if he didn't understood what was right if I could travel back in time I'd teach him how to be a father but if it wasn't for him I might not want good for another the voices quiet and vanish I try and get some sleep but to no avail so I blaze another reef

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Edvinas

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5 months ago

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5 months ago

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MC Sal

5 months ago

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