Everyday blues

every day i smoke and i smoke to het high Stress all day long and stay up all night God forgive me i know that im not living right Eveyday with this mental health issues is a fight And ive been cleans for a while not doing dope So im overdoing the weed as a way to cope But it aint giving me the high that im looking for So im buying pints at the liquor store Drinking away the pain with every glass that i pour Thinking about all how tired i am of life Tears flowing freely down my eyes Wishing i was anywhere but here Settling for less love cause my biggest fear Is being alone with nobody to have near I just want to loved and be loved like everyone else does Baby girl if you hear me just know that i miss how it used to be When you loved me like when you used you love me Theres so much i feel but i dont have the vocabulary to express what's on my chest To hold my composure i try my best But end up flipping and falling victim to deep depression Showing hate anger and aggression Mad at myself cause i keep failing the lesson And life keeps repeating itself making me pay For all the mistakes that ive ever made But right now im broke and i need to get paid The hustle musnt be delayed All i know its the streets and the narcotics trade Im looking for work so i can get a pack And flip it and make double the profit back If not im grabbing my glock putting on my masked and your getting jacked