Escape my feelings.

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It's hard to breathe. I try to hide my feelings But it's weighing heavy on me. I can explain it, so I'm running from it. So I keep searching for a way to escape my feelings But please believe me when I tell you that i'm working on it I'd be lying if I tell you that i'm happy homie You might not know it, but I'm kinda lonely. I'm also working on it. Even though most occasions. I get suicidal. But no i'm working on it Them break down was gotten messed up. Pain is like a demon in my heart. That's also messed up And the childhood trauma. That doesn't want to go missing If you relate, then you know that thing is suffocating. I try to talk, but they don't seem to get me. And this is kind of heavy. So I just keep it all inside Even though it kills me. They say they love me, but they can't help me. Or should I say that they don't wanna help me? . . I'm not afraid to die. I just might embrace it. You see me smiling, but the truth is that I'm really dying If you think it's easy, then I beg to differ. Cause you'd be lying. If it was true then I would never even bare to try. Do you know like?Do you really know That pain is my middle name. I try to hide it, but my actions don't lie. I look down then I let my tears fall. When I look up nobody even seems to care Nobody really cares. My heart is sending letters. It needs somebody to hold. So it keeps on trying and it keeps on failing. My heart stands strong. That's why it keeps on moving. They only love me and support me if it's beneficial real love. Real trust is a standard issue. I'll never get enough. Of feeling coz. Nobody shows it. I sit alone around my sons cause the numb pain

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