tired of this life

life is way harder than you think it is especially the life i had as a kid mother always drunk always full of drugs fake ass hugs fake ass love was tired of living life by the time i was 9 trying to kill myself i didn't even know life im tired of this life I'm tired of these lies I'm tired of always feeling like i want to die as i grew up i realized that not everyone lived my life which made it much harder giving me disorders living without order wishing I could grow up why did she make me live in this way why did she make my life a disgrace wishing i could just feel my pain always pushing out of my lane I'm tired of this life I'm tired of these lies I'm tired of always feeling like I want to die