My name is Bob and I am a recovering addict. I lost my mom to an overdose in 2003. I found her. When I lost her I wanted to die so I turned to pills. Pills became Heroin and any other mind altering substance I could get my hands on. My sobriety Date is May 23rd 2015. I ended up in jail. Before that almost lost my arm and died more times then I can count. I wrote the first half of this song 20 years ago. The chorus and second half was written 10 years ago. Recorded about 5 years ago. This is what made me who I am today. I'm not concerned nor do I expect to win the contest. If I can help 1 person on this app with this song it did its job. Help the next person. One day at a time. HAPPY MOTHERS DAY MOMS ✌&❤ Mixed/Produced: @Grade_A #breakingbad #findyourself #FY808 #808 #ei8ht #gradeA #syla #supportyourlocalartist #serenityprayer #wedorecover #sober #clean #52315 #rapfamebeast #moderator_en #bmbest #bmvideo #2k21 #2021fire #bmgrind #featurematerial #rap #bars #bmhiphop #rapfame #writernotrapper @rapfamebeast @moderator_en @bmbest God Grant me the Serenity To accept the things I cannot change The courage to change the things I can And the wisdom to know the difference Just imagine your mom The one women to some With unconditional love Saying every day crying That she wants to die Your soul sinks inside Makes you wanna burst out But you have to keep your eyes dry You know how much pain she's in Still you tell her it be fine Got these bad feelings Kinda push em aside Praying everyday You don't find her in bed dead Gun in one hand with a half a head You dreaded this Cause she's that depressed That stressed out Smile on her face To keep you at rest All her feelings Compressed And you read it in her eyes Cause her hearts a mess So I met this chick Who could have shot up thee Atlantic Kinda kept her off the H But she traded up habits Got me addicted to OPS And smoking coke To soak up all the sadness At the end of my rope Came home giggles and laughs Shit we had a blast Lost all our money gambling But still had a stash Woke up the next morning To another normal day Popped another Ox Down the hatch to stay awake Looking for my dogs I would take em out to play But I couldn't find happy She was in a different place Walked up my steps Trying to catch my breath Called out her name happy Then I heard the barking beck Got to the door Turned the squeaky know Opened it up And there Lay my mom Foam coming out her nose and mouth My jaw dropped Lipped started to quiver My heart just straight stopped Mom wake up you're not dead Jesus christ! Shook her arm crying Her skin was cold as ice Dead at 47 Only live half her life I know we all die someday Just the timings never right Cold so cold Lifeless skin with purple veins This being I once loved Like a butterfly has changed Deranged from the fact That she may have died in vain Insane from the thought If I was there she could be saved Another day of slavin Just tobbe a slave Another drug to eas the pains What's making me this way Another day of paying As soon as I get paid Another debt to dodge agains Another day I'm safe Now nobody can stop me When I'm popping oxys Like I can't control What takes ahold ands got me According to her autopsy This is what killed my mommy So now her little Bobby too Wants to feel like a zombie And probably copy The out she took in life Was 27 years old And attempted to commit Suicide more than twice It's not cause I think I've had it worst Or that I'm cursed It's cause I question my worth Through the one I loves terms Nobody loves me I'm fat and ugly No chick wants to fuck me Let alone hug me Most of my relationships I was treated like shit Verbally kicked and spit on But bit my lip and fuckin held it in Playas and wanna be pimps Used to call me a bitch Even some of the women I was with Would complain I was a wimp And that I was actually whipped What I called compassionate Sensitive to her spirit Instead of smashing and split Give her a rash and that's it No tantric orgasmic hammock That my banana perfectly fits A dessert deserving of bliss I'm not a fuckin scumbag I'm an addict of pleasure As a result of pain While pain is the end result Of the pleasure I tried to chain Caged tamed and kept EnSlaved So these good enough intentions Became an I'll gotten gain Wants the entire world to peacefully change While my life is still The day to day dejavu cycle That can't revert from the same Mundane Now is it me Or should the world inherit this blame? Another day of slavin Just tobbe a slave Another drug to eas the pains What's making me this way Another day of paying As soon as I get paid Another debt to dodge agains Another day I'm safe I just wanna Be free whatever that means Wanna Find peace by what ever the means I wanna Wanna be me whatever that means Just want to find peace by whatever the means