i grew up always hating life not knowing if what im doing is right am i making the right choices should i listen to the voices in my head telling me to just be quiet and go to bed itll be a long time before youre dead so i kept going just taking whatever life kept throwing people beat me up just to show everybody else whats up and i always had to be the kid who couldnt shut up guess i just could never get enough growing up i got pretty tough i could take beating i felt like my life just kept repeating the same shit over and over again and not a single friend already just wishin i was dead so i played a lot of video games so i could try to ignore all the pain i was a shy kid in a loud town i guess i just didnt fit when i was in grade 8 my parents split and it took a toll on my self conscious just thinking i really dont want this thats when the psychological warfare began my own house was iran couldnt even breathe without doing somethin wrong i just wanted to stay quiet and get my life along who were you to tell me my way of living is wrong thats when my bestfriend introduced me to the bong we were getting by getting high having a good fuckin time started skipping class fighting kids talking trash shit changed so fast and man i cherish the time we thought it would last now we 17 we been doing more than green people calling you a fiend drinking lots of lean doin a shit job of keeping our noses clean thinking we living the dream acted like a team we were a family and it fell apart so rapidly we all started to go our separate ways getting to a point where we miss the good days but the good days dont make much pay so we stealing out of cars tryna get some change people think we deranged but we ignore it and just keep soaring 18 now and i just moved out on my own and now i feel so alone im so depressed i cant keep this shit suppressed 19 now for 2 days already tried to kill myself i think i really need help i dont know about my mental health i just od'd i think i gotta lead on what i wanna do think i can finally say fuck you to everyone who doubted me i know what im doing now these songs ive been trying to write always thinking that they're tight maybe i am right maybe i cam do this maybe i can use this maybe i can fuse this with something to make people feel bad get back at everyone who made me sad im all alone and now im grown i moved out with reasonable doubt im taking the wrong route but ive been crying for help and nobody came what a shame but i get back up i havent had enough i always could take a beating