Reminiscent, to the days when I was different, before I was trying to be committed, in changing the life I was living, remember every day I was slipping, deeper and deeper into addiction, And I would go and look up at the stars and start wishing, that maybe I could shake this hinderance, cuz I know my existence is more then being just a piece of shit, I remember when I'd buy shit take two hits then flush it down the toilet, because this wasnt the position I wanted to be in, but that would only stay present for a little bit, I hate to admit it, I relapsed when I was doing good for myself and that's some real shit, I went against the rule of if it ain't broke dont fix it, and it put me into a 4 day battle questioning why I did this, so I refused to let myself live it down yeah I was giving myself no forgiveness, letting myself know everytime I felt like I was ok with what I did, that I'm a coward and i ain't but of the man I could have been, broke myself down into a pool of emotions and regret, told myself I've let down everybody who believed i was capable of kicking the habit, Now they gonna be pissed and you cant be mad if the dont want you as a friend, after I was on my knees head on the ground hair in my grips I wanted a second chance to prove I'm worth it, so I stood to my feet to see a broken image refelcted, it was me I seen I got the the intention of message I was sending, people love you for the person you are with your morals and ethics, see you are at war with depression and that's ok you dont have to get high to get past it, all I had to do is believe in who I am and if I needed more then this all I had to do is call one of my true friends, like mason and michaela, and the rest of the lymans they have always been legit when you needed anything and you know it, they brought you in at 18 with no place to live and made you feel at home with, yourself, so if you need your family step up and just ask if they have some time for an old friend to come over and explain what it is you need to get off your chest, I dont wanna digress i wanna get better and find success, be the greatest man you can create with the support you get, and find out the life you're supposed to actually live, and never forget what it takes to commit to quit using that bullshit, It's for me but cant thank my friends enough for the recognition, of myself starting make amends, and functioning as a real human in this world never second guess, your intention is to surpass the oppressed and cast a light for the rest...