Earnest Lucas

5 years ago

strolling through the streets ,dying as the world closes on me, at first it was hard as you all folded on me, every last day of my history, involves misguided happyness or misspoken words I didn't mean, but never was a action that had a loss or any subtraction, so instead of adden it's like u all attacken, I fall so helplessly in this hole and deeper I will sink, why must u cut an watch me bleed, instead of throwing roses on my feet, in the end of my life mystery, I hope the sky's shine down upon my soul, and suddenly everyone is screamingy my name and cheering so helplessly but that's jus in my dreams i come back to my body so effortlessly and I never catch myself ever guessing for happy endings bc I'm so beat down frown upawn not one to feel love it's jus make belief, so I slap my face and quickly wake up, I shake the break up, I take the mess that was made of, wishen an missen the love, man what I'd do jus for a single hug, to feel the warmth crawlen in my blood, my heart might beat again if I ragained ur love, my life would fall rite from the sky above, everyday I'd be in heaven, jus please come quick an quit the guessen, we both Kno the answer to the question, why worry bout others and all there shitty suggestions, they don't Kno our love nor any of our misguided affection, so quit dodging my question it's my prayer I pray to send to heaven every night I lay for resten by my love my one an only affection, I'd treat u like a goddess anything u could ever waste ur breath on is yours no doubt or no questions if only u agree to be my queen sent from heaven, plz girl don't leave me guessing, one last time. jus feelthe affection Im on my fuckin knees prayen to heaven and relentlessly beggen I die jus to have our once told fairy tale of a wedding, without u my life's a Armageddon. that big no word is the only thing my mind is dreading but if it's a yes I'd be a legend, damn the thought of it jus has my chest so tight my heart's beating so hard searching for ur lost affection, please let me heal those wound I gave to u I'll nurture u back to health an there would be no reason to ever want another wish from the skys above, if i could jus finally have my misplaced love, my beautiful loving cub, it could all be over with the start of a single hug, nobody will ever have enough strength to ever break up the bond built around our love, the bond alone is a girft sent to us from the watchers up above so jus come back to me, don't jus sit as the laugh at me, yes I know our history we both have wounds an we both sat and watched them bleed, but that was jus two kids dishin misguided choices kept on losing faith and listening to all the voices from the people hating an tryna poison all that we had bc they were all jus just jeleous, wishing they had wat we had always being selfish but now thanks to the voices we both walked away as the bond slowly perished. but I will always love u forever, soaring and roaring Everytime it melted, but the pieces I've kept locked away an protected, I Kno u see it there, I can look with a glance an see ur face an heart shine so bright because I see it in ur eyes. I was never alone the love was there with u aswell, u can't hide it girl, I see it through u I Kno u felt it, our hearts are forever binded like to ores being smeltee, for ever together I love u girl I'm sorry I jus can't help it. it's hard to hide it bae, it hurts I kno I was the one who delt it, nd now let me be the one rebelt it, I'll never let u go again, I won't ever be so selfish, jus please grant my last request, fix the broken beaten in my chest, the love I have for u I everything I have it's the only bit that's left, jus to have the love we once both cherished. jus please don't let us fade away to perish, I don't think u bitches get it, u better fix it up, twist it up, learn it up, honestly I could give no fucks gotta get me a quick hustle up, it's time to get my shit on track, yea time to buckle up, even when I have nothing left in me, every last feeling an is dead to me, I still get it like a g, an act like nothing fases me, relentlessly suffocating, ppl playing mind games and fakin on me, but nothing can't finish me out or will ever be bigger than my self, I'm invicible like a fucken menace, but it was always that I was so Ill, so fucken real, actually having my two boys to raise and appreciate, is wat did it to me, it's so fuckin nice to see there cute little faces smiling at me an jus the thought of knowing daddy is loved and my kids are always proud of me, it's the reason im our the streets, it's why I fight to succeed, my boys create the life that is surrounded me, without them I be much worse off, or even loss with never Haven been found, but in reality my dum ass would probably be buries under ur feet deep in the ground, my life wasn't aways ugly nor was it a perfect memory put together to make a happy loveing movie, I did my share of mistakes and I fight everyday struggling to better my mistakes and repay for the pain I spent and bent, I fucked it up, my luck was up, I was so fucken close to given up, but then my kids showed up, I gained some fauth, from to beautiful kids I made, wth a very lovely lady, so hear me out, I'm not finished remolding my life, I want it jus rite so my kids will never have he thoughts, actions or reactions that was played out for me, I want them to have the best life ever, cuz in the end when I lay my final breathe I want to be assured that they have had the best life I could have ever provided due to our cercummstances, I done being down losing am frowning, time to get it out the mud, .I jus hope it turns out the way I hope it does so I ask everyone to show see love. I simple aknowledgement is all I need to crush the negativity insidey head bc with all that shit I jus wanna quit an wish I was dead. but never again I walk with pride and everyday I havemy chin up never will I lose