LYRICS: YOU LOOK LIKE A SCIENCE EXPERIMENT GONE WRONG IN A DOLLAR STORE LAB, BUILT LIKE A WI-FI SIGNAL WITH NO BARS. YOUR STYLE'S SO OUTDATED, EVEN MYSPACE WON'T TAKE YOU BACK. TALKING TO YOU FEELS LIKE BUFFERING ON DIAL-UP – SLOW AND PAINFUL. YOU DRESS LIKE YOU GET FASHION ADVICE FROM A MAGIC 8-BALL, AND YOUR JOKES ARE AS STALE AS MONTH-OLD BREAD. IF IGNORANCE IS BLISS, YOU MUST BE LIVING IN PARADISE. YOUR FACE COULD SCARE A BUZZARD OFF A GUT WAGON, AND YOUR VOICE IS SO ANNOYING IT COULD MAKE AN ASMR ARTIST QUIT THEIR JOB. YOU’RE SO CLUELESS, YOU'D GET LOST IN A BROOM CLOSET. YOUR BRAIN'S ON VACATION BUT YOUR MOUTH'S WORKING OVERTIME. EVERY TIME YOU SPEAK, I LOSE BRAIN CELLS FASTER THAN A VAMPIRE AT A GARLIC FESTIVAL.