And Matthew the Levite did enter the inn, and there was a great consternation around, for they all wished to know who this great man was and where he had come from, and they did say unto him, who are you, and Matthew the Levite did make to reply, but spoke only softly, and the many gathered did have to lean in to hear the old man. And so Matthew the Levite made reply, and he did say unto them, I'm apostolic I'm apostolic Look up the fucking word if you don't know it I'm apostolic I'm apostolic Suck up the fucking turd you piece of shit I'm sorry, I get rhyming and lose the run of myself Lose track and my manners end up on the shelf I'm apostolic I'm apostolic I'm a mirror trick I'm a two tonne bottle of pure sick I'm a patch of oil on the cement, yeah I'm fucking slick I'm apostolic I'm apostolic But I'm new to this Never dropped bars on a beat this shit No Stephen king no clown shit this ain't it I'm apostolic I'm apostolic Come right in, won't you sit Cup of tea? Coffee? Don't be shy, kid You got moxie, you got talent, you got what it takes To go straight to the top with two quick shakes Now full speed ahead boys, fourth gear no brakes Don't stop for all our sakes The heats on our tail like scum on a lake I'm apostolic I'm apostolic A fish comes up for air once a week The junkie needs a hit or else he'll tweak The mountain runs rugged up to its peak And the whores eyebrows must always stay fleak The circus collects it's miscreants and freaks And all of them squeak form a malformed beak The fish the junkie the mountain the whore Where the fuck did I hear this story before? I'm apostolic I'm apostolic Have a glass won't you, it's a vintage I adooore Oh don't tell me you don't like jazz, o dear what a bore I'm apostolic With a slap to the head knock em dead to the floor Now the rich yuppie wallows in the blood from his core Rolls around and spurts, gives a yelp then no more I'm apostolic, haven't I told you that before And with those words spoken aloud, the crowd did utter a great cry of surprise and admiration, for it was clear to all that this was a truly great and wise man, and a true apostle of Christ. And there, in a puddle on the floor of the inn, lay Matthew the Levite, and it became known to be his final resting place upon the earthly firmament, for the apostle had passed beyond the veil with a great cry of triumph.