Yo, gather 'round, let me tell you 'bout Oscar, The postal worker with a neck like a pasta. Lived with his folks, yeah, he's a real catch, But with a hairy neck, he's like Bigfoot's match. (Chorus) Oscar, the postman, with hairy neck so bold, Little legs like toothpicks, he's a sight to behold. (Verse 2) Mom's cooking, dad's jokes, that's his daily routine, But Oscar's still living like he's seventeen. Delivering mail with a waddle and a prance, With a hairy neck dance, he's the mailman in trance. (Chorus) Oscar, the postman, with hairy neck so bold, Little legs like toothpicks, always in the cold. (Bridge) With a neck like that, he could star in a zoo, And those little legs, man, what's he gonna do? But Oscar don't care, he's living his best life, With hairy neck charm, he's causing some strife. (Verse 3) So here's to Oscar, the postman delight, With a neck full of fur, and legs not quite right. Thirty and thriving, in his parents' pad, But with jokes like his, who needs to be sad? (Chorus) Oscar, the postman, with hairy neck so bold, Little legs like toothpicks, never growing old.