Yo I watch you walk away cause I didn't think you'd leave I thought that you knew that you meant everything to me I know we get mad and we yell and blow steam But now you're gone I only see you in my dreams Don't know what to do cause lately I've been lacking passion Self inflicted pain, just to cause a damn reaction Telling people not to cut, I'm lying to the masses Cause I've been in my room with the blade fucking laughing Now I love the pain, it's evolved to an addiction Only time my head is straight is off the prescriptions But the voices in my head tell me keep resisting So I shed the tears and stare into the distance Don't know what I'm looking for, but now I know it's hope And I'm not gonna find that from these pills or the dope Burned in my emotions with each breath of the smoke I know that this time, I'll find a better way to cope I think you broke my heart again Please don't leave and take my hand I gave you every part of me everything I had You embrace the good and you tone on the bad Said that we'd be fine and that you'd always have my back But now you're gone, I'm alone feeling like trash I'm the love ship sinker, dumb kid singer Tuff boy demeanor, I'm the stupid over thinker I've been tryna solve my problems with the hit of a blunt I won't lie, I ain't been sober in months I just smoke when I feel like, no one gives a fuck Or when I'm in the dump, just wishing to give it up That's every single day, these drugs are now apart of me I'm a painter who's confused and lacking artistry