big dreams down the drain , most of my life I've been in pain and I'm sick of it , why me why do I keep facing it give me a brake I cant keep going through it I'm losing everything, I'm on my own I'm feeling alone , got anxiety cant even pick up my phone, suppose il stay in my zone, on my own thinking back to old times when my children were with me, remonising ,fucking suffocating from pain ,my kids I'm missing , haters are dissing while im sat here crying , fucking wishing, that my muma didn't die ,every day and night I'm asking why , why is it cancer exist ,why is it my mumma that deserved this , it's been a year now and I can't grieve I cant let go I cant stand this ,Christmas eve u went to heaven and I gave u a Kiss, and I'll never forget the way I saw you I just knew ,laying there eyes closed no blank stare ,mouth now closed ,no longer breathing ,oh fuck my mummas really leaving and I'm glad I believe in life after death coz ur too special to pure to really be dead ,so mumma to heaven and be free live for eternity, your love will forever be apart of me I see you when I look in the mirror and I see things clear , I no I cant see you but I'm sure that your nere, I sence you around me all the time mum I miss you mum oh mum why mum arrg just come back for a day let me saying everything that I never got to say in that bed where I last see u lay is always there stuck on replay in my head u in that bed could speak could see but I no you could hear me , so I told you let go now mum , dont stay here and suffer you been so strong but u been fighting to long you dont deserve to feel pain, let go mum go live thea peaceful way I'll be with u one day mum. I love you forever & I'll never forget ya ♡