as I wake up to this reality of u not being here with me I'm blinded by this darkness and I can barley see I need some clearity and I'm wishing u were here with me I need an ear do u hear me speak wish u would guide me in the right direction this is my life I'm trying to perfect it lead me toward perfection but I'm not normal ND its awful like I have nothing left to offer everyone tells me I'm sick and I need a doctor and medicine to alter my feelings inside that bothers the monster that has me drowning in the quicksand it's so wicked I hate its so twisted where is he I got to find him the old me I really miss him I'm on a mission to find myself I been missing reminiscing on the times damn f sometimes I feel like my mind is a prison I just don't think I'll ever be enough to love my heart is feeling crushed and it turns in to dust and the beast within unleasheshes breaking everything in my parh like shards of glass that breaks into a million pieces all I can do is look up and pray to Jesus I'm begging ne pleading askimg if he can u save from my demons